Hey CaliCattleDogs! We took Cleo with us to have our car smogged and walked her around a neighborhood and, well, she’s scared and tries to act tough barking and lunging at people and we can’t figure out how to help her get over it. I know she is not aggressive, tail is wagging, but she acts like it and honestly it scared the sh*t out of people. She continuously lunged after a man jogging and I had to literally sit on her to calm her down. She was very stressed the whole time and I was scared of her wiggling out of her harness to chase someone and running into the street. My partner is always calm so he had the leash and control of her. I don’t want to accidentally reinforce her fear, it’s frustrating because people’s reactions to her frenzied lunging and barking don’t help her. I’m sure my being scared of something happening to her doesn’t help either.
@violetranch
Dear Violet Ranch,
That’s intense, but I know how to help. I think the transition might be a little overwhelming for her. It’s too much all at once. Let’s talk it out.
You’re probably right that your fear is adding to her’s as she senses it, but obviously that is not as easy to solve as most people make it sound! Right out of the gate, I’ll tell you something you’ve probably already learned…cattle dogs hate being contained. Sitting on her is probably going to make it worse, not better. When she needs to be restrained until she calms down, try hugging or swaddling her instead. Align your hearts, take deep breaths, calmly repeat to her “it’s okay, we’re okay” and let her catch her breath and evaluate the surroundings in the safety of your arms.
You and Cleo both need to ease into it. You’re embarking on a new life together that will be full of wonder and joy but it is different than what you’re both used to. It’s perfectly natural to need a little time to adjust and get bearings, for both of you, and it’s also okay sometimes to take a break.
Instead of ripping off the bandaid and taking her everywhere all the time to rapidly socialize her, try slowly adjusting the daily routine a little each day. Kind of like I did with Rolo. You don’t need to do even remotely the same things necessarily, but follow the strategy…
Start by taking her for a drive first thing in the morning and go to the same place, somewhere she’ll get a treat. We do Starbucks and pup cups, but it can be anything, just get used to being in the car and making getting in the car exciting because she will know where she’s going and get excited.
You’re probably right that your fear is adding to her’s as she senses it, but obviously that is not as easy to solve as most people make it sound!
Once she figures out the new routine, change it up a little more by adding another stop or event where she where someone comes up to the car like a drive thru. We do the car wash, one that always has dog treats. Rolo barked and freaked like crazy at first but now they are his bffs and he gets super excited.
Next, something where she gets out of the car. The pet store or general store. Again, the people will become familiar and she’ll come to be excited to see them. There will also be other people randomly besides the staff who are always there so slowly she’ll get exposure to meeting new people. The first ones will be a little rough, but some of the people will be patient dog lovers and earn her trust, slowly she will realize strangers aren’t generally dangerous.
At that point, you’re pretty much able to start taking her anywhere.
It doesn’t even have to be those exact things…the point is slowly add a little more a little at a time. Social training is about the long game, it takes a lot of patience and repeated exposure. Find the places with dog lovers and hone in on those, you’ll find people who will know what to do and be more prepared for the unexpected than just random joggers.
Instead of ripping off the bandaid and taking her everywhere all the time to rapidly socialize her, try slowly adjusting the daily routine a little each day.
That can be any place btw, not just places for dogs. Like the car wash. It’s a CAR WASH lol there is nothing for them to do there but it is kind of scary. I found a particular one that is run by people who love dogs and always have dog treats because they know people have dogs with them and it can be scary for dogs and treats give them something to be excited about and not be afraid. Places like that are EVERYWHERE once you learn how to look for them and see them.
Most importantly, talk YOURSELF up, not down. When the fear tinges, take a deep breath and say “we’re okay because we have each other” and smile. It will calm you down and make you feel better, and that will radiate to her instead of the fear and help her learn to calm down. It won’t work magically right away the first time, but if you keep doing it both you and she will pick up on it and it will become very effective. The power of a smile is real and it transcends species.
On a more detailed and technical note, when she is meeting new people, let them know to wait patiently and let her approach them. If she doesn’t want to approach, don’t make her. Let her observe from a distance until she’s ready. Trust me, eventually curiosity will win and she’ll get someone. They will almost certainly be someone who radiates a love of dogs (likely what will peak her curiosity) and will patiently hold out their hand for her to sniff. She’ll get closer and closer to people until one day she’ll find someone she likes enough that she is ready to trust a little and she will nose-nudge them or kiss them and then probably run away like she’s scared again. Be super happy and excited when she does that and tell her how good she is and how nice it is to make new friends. She’ll do it again eventually with someone else, and eventually stop running away.
The point is slowly add a little more a little at a time. Social training is about the long game, it takes a lot of patience and repeated exposure. Find the places with dog lovers and hone in on those.
I find it really effective and helpful to use the word “friend” whenever I want them to know I have identified someone as friendly. Cattle Dogs are guardian dogs, the first instinct is always to serve and protect you, so they will always look to you to assess the threat level. If you always say “hi friend” when you see someone you know to be friendly, she will learn the audio cue and your correlating body language, pheromone chemistry, etc. and she’ll figure out how to quickly read that someone is a friend that she should greet with excitement. Again, it takes time, patience, and most of all persistence, but it will work. Even my Lambo who was an absolute terrorized little terror and scared of and aggressively attacked everything and everyone is now a happy, friendly, playful, silly girl. It took years with her (she had been abused by her breeder so she had a major setback), but with Cleo she has already known love and will recognize it, she just needs to learn that it comes from lots of places and people besides just you. She will, you will show her the way ❤️
Last thing: MARTINGALE COLLARS! A must have for leash training cattle dogs. Don’t get the metal/spiky ones, go for the double ring woven ones that won’t hurt them, but will stay on more reliably the more they pull (think the classic kids’ finger trap device) and will be uncomfortable enough for them to get the message that they have to calm down. It also puts them in control of the discomfort, teaching them that relaxing is the better reaction.
As always, we’re here to support you and I hope to hear about good progress soon!
@CaliCattleDogs
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